Among the various aspects of life that have their own appropriate “time,” Ecclesiastes 3:7 gives, “a time to keep silence, and a time to speak.” Judging between the two requires great wisdom. The conscientious will likely grapple with nuances between the two their entire lives (Prov. 15:28). The book of Proverbs is filled with instructions on the use of words and the caution against speaking too much.
My words may also drastically alter another’s reputation. False charges and insinuations made in private conversations harm others (Prov. 11:9). Slander robs a man of his good name, which is more valuable than great riches of silver and gold (Prov. 22:1). The Bible forbids gossip (Rom. 1:29; 2 Cor. 12:20; 1 Tim. 5:13). “He that goeth about as a tale-bearer revealeth secrets; but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth a matter” (Prov. 11:13). Words reveal the character of the one who speaks them (Matt. 12:34; Luke 6:45).
One does not have to reveal secrets when communicating with a wicked person. Silence is one possible response to wickedness (2 Kgs. 18:36; Matt. 26:62, 63; Mark 14:60, 61). One avoids saying things that will be misused. It may not be appropriate for a man to respond to certain evil things said about him. The wise Solomon wrote, “Also take not heed unto all words that are spoken, lest thou hear thy servant curse thee; for oftentimes also thine own heart knoweth that thou thyself likewise hast cursed others” (Eccles. 7:21, 22). Contrariwise, where the Lord’s cause may suffer due to a poor reputation based on false charges, a response to gossip or rumors is required. While Jesus was silent to some inquiries, He also responded to false charges on occasion (John 8:48, 49). Paul was motivated to salvage his reputation in Philippi (Acts 16:37). So sometimes it is necessary to respond to slander.
Take Colossians 4:5-6 as a general rule: “Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer each one.” Wisdom should be employed to make the best use of all the opportunities life presents. In the context of the passage, Paul was concerned about saying what he ought to say to further the message of Christ. What one says must be gracious to attract people to the truth. Beyond the ethical test of making sure words are truthful (Eph. 4:25), the question of whether words are needed or beneficial remains. One should speak when the words will be beneficial.
In fulfilling Isaiah 53:9, Jesus is the perfect ethical example of suffering without sinning with His lips, “For hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, that ye should follow his steps: who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously” (1 Pet. 2:21-23). Aside from silence or ignoring a question for a while (John 8:6-7), Jesus responded in many other ways to people. Jesus often cited Scriptures when someone asked Him a question (Matt. 12:1-7; 15:1-9; 19:3-5; 22:23-40). He sometimes answered questions with a question of His own (Matt. 21:24-25; Luke 10:26). He sometimes refused to take sides and would lift the question to a matter of higher importance (Luke 12:13-15; 13:1-5). He knew when to gently correct (Luke 10:40-42; John 4:20-24) and when to return critics’ reasoning back on them (John 7:20-24), sharply rebuke (Matt. 23), and use godly sarcasm (Matt. 23:24). Of course, Christians are never going to be perfect in their responses as Jesus was, but He is the ultimate ethical example in speech.
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