Yesterday I conducted a wedding. I have had very few opportunities to officiate at a wedding. The wedding yesterday brought me great joy to be a part of the joining of a man and a woman in marriage. You see, I performed the wedding of my mother and her fiancé. When I say I was a part in joining the man and woman together make no mistake, God does the joining (Matthew 19:6). However, mankind is required to obey the laws of the land (1 Peter 2:13-14) so long as those laws are not in conflict with the Law of God (Acts 5:29). The civil marriage law, in whatever country or locale, must be followed. However, since God has given marriage to man, it is God that sets the requirements or limitations for scriptural marriage and thus, joins a couple together.
Scriptural marriage is between a biological male and a biological female. It is sad that a person today must clarify this in today’s world. Many would make the claim that gender is fluid and a person can self-identify as male or female regardless of biology. Well folks, there are only two genders, and that is based on biological sex, male or female (Matthew 19:4). Also, this would exclude “homosexual marriages” which are not marriages in the Biblical sense of the word. As indicated at the beginning of the article, God sets the rules for marriage and from the beginning Scriptural marriage is between a man and a woman.
Scriptural marriage can be entered by one who has never been married. Marriage is a great blessing from God to man and the first divine institution (government and the church are the other two). After God made man “the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet (suitable – JDS) for him,” Genesis 2:18. The husband is to love his wife, the wife is to submit to her husband (Ephesians 5:22ff). They are “joined together,” literally “yoked together” indicating they are closely united and pulling together in things in life, whatever may come.
Scriptural marriage can be entered by one whose spouse had died. In Romans 7:2-3, Paul says, “For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.” While Paul is using marriage in this context as an illustration that the Jews are no longer under the Old Covenant and can, without “spiritual adultery,” be subject to the New Covenant, he teaches a marital truth. Those whose spouses have died are eligible to be remarried to another being loosed from their first marriage.
Scriptural marriage can be entered by one who has been scripturally married and scripturally divorced. This is the marital plague of our society today. Many believe that marriage is “just for now” or “until something better comes along.” They do not want to believe that marriage is the serious, lifelong covenant (Malachi 2:14) that it is. God has allowed one exception for scriptural divorce and remarriage, “And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery,” Matthew 19:9. The innocent party whose spouse has committed fornication (a sexual act) has the option (right) to divorce their mate and eventually marry another with God’s approval.
God’s marriage law is loving and strict. In the case of my mother and her boyfriend, I could perform their marriage ceremony because their spouses had died and they were free to marry. However, I have beloved family members whom I could not perform their wedding due to the circumstances they described of a divorce which God does not approve. Friend, God’s marriage law is for all mankind and must be obeyed.
-Jerry D. Sturgill
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